Nicholas Barrett

"I used to dream of becoming an author - and now I are one!!"

Greetings, dear People:

Some of you may know me by my Title- Lord Elpas.

I was born (according to parental legend), at 04:50 on January 25th 1960.

The dwelling that nurtured myself, my Mother, Aunt, and three other siblings, was a former smallholding in the village of Great Gonerby, in Lincolnshire. It had no running indoor water, ice on the inside windows during winter, yet was filled to capacity with love and laughter. It also had a resident ghost called Mr Goodman, who was polite and exceptionally tidy. His presence was confirmed to me by means of demonstration at the age of six.

I attended Primary school in the village, and then Kings school Grantham (it is this establishment which has provided the inspiration for “St Onans Academy” in my books). Following a spell at Art College, I discovered Rock music – and toured the country, plus little bits of Europe, as a drummer. In between gigs, I worked for the Local Authority in Sheffield for 19 years. I also found some time to tread the boards as a stand-up comedian, which was tremendous fun, and sometimes terrifying (often during the same evening). During this period, I began to secretly collate the ideas for my books...

Having met a Lady who saved my sanity, I removed myself down to Essex, where I began work with the Royal Mail – progressing to Operations Manager for six years. My forest of notes was growing ever larger, and I decided that I should make the “leap of faith” and become a writer. With no regret whatsoever, I left the firm, and began life behind my keyboard. I decided to write the kind of books that I always wanted to read, but seemed unable to find. In late 2015, I had my first book “Michaelmas Term (or- why is that boy naked?)” finished. Following the expected rejections, I finally had the book published by Pegasus Elliot Mackenzie on 25th August 2016. The first book has been incredibly well-received, and has generated some amazing reviews; despite no help at all from the publishers... who proved as useful as water-skis in the shower.

Book two of the series - “Advent Term (or- Snowmen don’t wear Thermals)” was published on April 25th 2017, and has been published via amazon KDP and createspace.com

My books are the antidote to the doom, gloom and depression of everyday living. I address very real issues on the pages, such as isolation, injustice, bullying and class division. I hope that seeing how my characters deal with issues such as these, may help the reader address any similar problems which they may have suffered- or are still suffering. Life Lessons are hardest to learn, and so I get the people in my books to assist with the homework...

I now have a splendid series of books which feature the boys of St Onans Academy:

“Michaelmas Term (or- why is that boy naked?)” Published August 2016

“Advent Term (or- Snowmen don’t wear Thermals)”

“Spring Term - The Sap Rises!”

“Summer Term – The Darling Buds of Mayhem”

“The Sixth Form Sense – I see Dead Clever People”

There is also a sixth instalment in progress – “Academy Wars II - Revenge of the Sixth”.

In between visits to St Onans, I have written a Sherlock Holmes-style Detective spoof called “Royal Flush”, a psychological horror story “The Red Carpet”, and a futuristic thriller concerning computers and human souls, entitled “Downtime”.

Just published is my first Paranormal/horror novel "The Cold Moon", which was just as terrifying to write, as it is to read...

I seem to be rather busy! But I try to find the time to appear as a guest speaker for groups, libraries, schools and colleges when asked.

So there we are...that brings us almost up to date.

As for tomorrow?......

Here is a rather splendid review by a rather splendid reader, for your delight and delectation.

"Nick Barrett's first three books were great, but this one is even better! Following close on the heels of Ronald Searle and Terry Pratchett, Nick is now set to join the ranks of the British comedy writer elite. His glorious depictions of grammar school life are wickedly funny. This latest book is a throwback to the halcyon days of our schoolboy adolescence, with a riotous assembly of characters that both Charles Dickens and Tom Sharpe would be proud to call their own. Nick paints a picture of some very interesting times - the vintage stuff of schoolboy legend. This continuing saga of a band of post-pubescent schoolboys and a monstrous regiment of larger-than-life, school masters and mistresses, abounds with mischief, mayhem and the odd indecent exposure. Combine this with incompetent secret service agents, escaped prisoners, and a thief of time on the cricket pitch, and you have all the elements that we have come to know and love in a Nicholas Barrett book. He takes remarkable pleasure in schoolboy innuendoes and is capable of the wittiest and most biting turns of phrase. This book does for the Boys Grammar Schools what St. Trinian's did for the girls, and more. I for one, cannot wait to read the next instalment (A levels here we come!) and know deep down, that it must now simply be a matter of time before someone recognises the true potential of this series and turns them into a movie, or TV series – Netflix please take note!"