Deni Iseli

Only at the age of fifty years did I know that I was highly sensitive (HSP). That experiencing the second World War had caused PTSD (PostTraumatic Stress Disorder) in my parents, was un unpleasant discovery for me. Moving from Indonesia to the Netherlands was already a major change in many ways. Parents who could not cope with each other, were an extra factor that had only increased the stress level in my life. Without realizing it, I began from my side to build up dissociation at an early age, as protection against the outside world. On the other hand, I had no emotional support through a warm family relationship, because my psychic problems were considered a weakness. In addition, in our family, high sensitivity is not taken seriously. I was not able to withstand all the tensions with which I was confronted and ended up in a prolonged burn-out in 2009. Because of all the tensions within and outside of the family, my dissociation got worse and my neurotransmitters were working less and less well. The psychic processing of my youth is therefore not easy at all. The daily symptoms are numerous and diverse. Through appropriate therapy since 2015, I see life more realistic and my view on people becomes more decisive. There is more between heaven and earth than one thinks. As far as I know, I seem to be the only family member who actually has therapy and, as a result, will develop positively as a person.