Jeff Mills

Jeff Mills is a lot of things: artist, writer, photographer, world traveler, daydreamer, Scottish Lord, Purveyor of Pathetic Puns, LEGO enthusiast, collector of oddities, Martian Ambassador to Earth (unofficial), and grocery clerk. He divides his time between working, working, and working, and when he does have a free moment (every other Thursday between 11:45 and noon), he stops to smell the LEGO flowers—though, admittedly, the scent is fairly faint. Born and raised in the Blue Ridge Mountains near Roanoke, VA, he earned a degree from Bridgewater College sometime in the late 1900s before turning his attention to the exciting world of groceries, where even now he can be seen carefully placing items on shelves, when he’s not banished to the Sweat Box to engage in his Alec Guinness impersonation.

When the world does finally end, he will be the guy with the folding lawn chair sitting atop the highest mountain, cracking jokes until the meteor hits; those within earshot will side with the rock.