Boynton Milo (1 results)

Hardcover. Condition: Good. No Jacket. On offer is the diary of a 21-year-old Rodman, New York man who chronicles his tortured semester at Fairfield Academy in Herkimer County before returning home and later boarding a fishing vesselhis entries filled with self-hatred, longing, and a consuming wish to meet the expectations of family, faith, and society. Milo S. Boynton (18331857), son of Jonathan and Maria (Kinney) Boynton, was sent to Fairfield Academy (or Fairfield Collegiate Institute) at twenty-one. Through his diary he reveals constant spiritual struggle, writing of temptation, failure, and vows to "live wholly to the Lord." Though he never names his sins, his language ("the Enemy of my soul," "a hell upon Earth," "deliver me from this hellish influence") points to conflict that to modern readers suggests forbidden desire. A researcher has proposed he struggled with his sexuality; while unconfirmed, the guilt and recurring "unnameable temptation" make such a reading plausible. Within antebellum Protestant morality, the diary is both faith testimony and coded record of repression and shame. He begins with resolve: "I find myself in Fairfield Collegiate Institute pondering over the Sciences I have made the Resolution to live this year wholly to the Lord." [Jan 1 1855] Next day he confesses: "My studise went rather hard The Enemy has had more control over me than I should have allowed." [Jan 2] His torment deepens: "I saw that there was a crisis at hand the Enemy of my soul had wrestled hard with me." [Jan 3] "I felt very free in our Prayer meeting but for all this I am not what I ought to be I have lost my zeal for the study." [Feb 18] Amid lessons, illness, and prayer he notes: "I rose at ten minutes before four about twenty cases of sickness in the Academy." [Jan 3] "Br. Vandercook preached Spoke of sins separating men from God." [Feb 11] "Quite a talk with Br. Yeomans and Cheeseman on holiness." [Mar 12] He observes strict rules and peer scrutiny: "Tomorrow will seal my destiny in Geometry I feel that I am indifferent to the Lord." [Mar 15] "My chum has decided to go home my Lesson this day in moral science was upon Prayer." [Feb 23] As spring nears he debates whether to stay: "Received a letter from Melvin Talked with Br. Van Patten and prayed." [Mar 16] "Wrote a letter to Melvin stating my intentions to stay Br. Stebbins advised me not to stay." [Mar 17] He leaves in April 1855: "Spent most of the afternoon arranging my room Br. Johnson staid with me overnight." [Apr 3] "I bid Br. Yeomans farewell, may the good Lord ever be with him." [Apr 4] Back home he plans to sail aboard the John Simmons: "Was advised to take a trip on the Ocean." [Apr 6] "Wrote letter to Br. Vandercook informing him of my intentions." [Apr 9] "This day I shipped aboard the John Simmons Where shall I be in 5 months. O Lord bless me." [May 3] On his final night ashore: "I have bid farewell Shall I ever forget this night O what will poor human nature stoop toa hell upon Earth." [May 7] At sea his penitence remains: "Another week has passed we have taken 7337 fish. I have caught 385." [June 3] Returning that October he writes: "Land ho! it did not meet my expectations." His last entry, May 18 1856: "By the grace of God I hope to spend no more time in lamenting past sins keep me in the way for thy sons sake. Amen!" Boynton died March 28 1857 at twenty-three. His diary stands as both spiritual testimony and portrait of a young man caught between devotion, doubt, and a yearning he could not namean eloquent record of how mid-19th-century moral and gender codes constrained inner life. Condition: Good; spine chipped, binding loose, old watermark, writing clear. Bio Notes: Fairfield Academy (founded 1802) became Fairfield Seminary and Fairfield Collegiate Institute, known for coeducation and reform. Milo S. Boynton (Oct 28 1833Mar 28 1857) was one of nine children of Jonathan and Maria (Kinney) Boynton, early Methodist settlers of Rodman, New York. Signed by Author(s).