Be Loved for Who You Really Are: How the Differences Between Men and Women Can Be Turned into the Source of the Very Best Romance You'll Ever Know - Hardcover

Sherven, Judith; Sniechowski, Jim

Hardcover

ISBN 10: 1580632068 ISBN 13: 9781580632065

Publisher: Renaissance Books, 2001

Synopsis

Based on their 14 years together as relationship trainers working with over 100,000 singles and couples, Judith Sherven and James Sniechowski have developed a truly new and original way to approach relationships. Be Loved for Who You Really Are describes how differences between partners can be a source of understanding and intimacy, enhancing rather than destroying a relationship. Readers learn to recognize the process of understanding differences, and what is necessary to keep lovemaking and romance alive for a lifetime.

Be Loved for Who You Really Are outlines a natural and predictable path that love requires, called the arc of love. Within this arc are four inevitable passages that enable the reader to better understand the challenges and pitfalls they will encounter, and to not confuse conflicts and tough times with disaster or failure.

The idea of a "passage" is used because as love evolves between two people it requires that they face into and grow through a number of challenges. Those challenges are necessary for them to mature in the wisdom of their love and intimacy and in the day-to-day relationship they are co-creating.

The four passages are:

*A Glimpse of What Is Possible, the wonderful time of falling in love when you actually see the per-fection of your partner.

*The Clash of Differences, when your love is tested through the inevitable conflicts that emerge from your differences.

*The Magic of Differences, when those very same differences allow you to be respected and loved for the person you truly are.

*And The Grace of Deep Intimacy, when the passionate wonder of the beginning is now yours, through and through, and your love touches everyone you encounter.

Unlike most relationship books, which are written primarily for women, Be Loved for Who You Really Are speaks to women and men equally. Judith & Jim underscore the fact that men are just as hungry for this kind of life-changing information.

Throughout Be Loved for Who You Really Are, Judith and Jim provide inspiring examples that show how love lives between people, and that differences can actually be the key to the deepest connection being together has to offer.

About this title

Review:

At a time when it's popular to believe men and women come from different planets, the husband and wife psychology team of Judith Sherven and James Sniechowski takes a far different approach in Be Loved for Who You Really Are. Using case histories, examples, and exercises from their own marriage and 14 years as relationship trainers, the authors suggest that individual and sex differences are not the source of relationship problems. Instead, they assert that true intimacy can be found in mapping and acknowledging differences as relationships ripen with time. You can't hurry love, say Shervan and Sniechowski, who counsel couples to understand four predictable passages to lasting love. These passages include "A glimpse of what is possible," "The clash of differences," "The magic of differences," and "The grace of deep intimacy." In each stage, couples are discouraged from hiding their differences or manipulating their partner to change, and rather are persuaded to encounter each other in genuine, unguarded ways. The book would have been strengthened with less New Age vocabulary and more examples from the authors' marriage, but overall, this is a wise and intriguing guide to creating a lasting love. --Barbara Mackoff

About the Author:

In addition to their psychological expertise, Judith Sherven, Ph.D. and James Sniechowski, Ph.D. have been guest-experts on over 500 television and radio shows, including Oprah, The View, 48 Hours, and The O'Reilly Factor. They enjoy their own successful marriage of fifteen years and reside in Windham, New York.

About this edition

• Publisher: Renaissance Books
• Publication date: 2001
• ISBN 10: 1580632068
• ISBN 13: 9781580632065
• Binding: Hardcover
• Edition number: 1
• Number of pages: 288