Santa Steps Out: A Fairy Tale for Grown-Ups (Limited)

"Visions far tastier than sugarplums dance in Santa's head tonight..."

His generosity is legendary. He has a devoted wife, a crack team of sky-borne reindeer, hordes of industrious elves, and the love of good little boys and girls around the globe. But what dark desire now propels him into the lascivious clutches of a certain fairy? And who was he before sleigh and workshop, in times forgotten?

She munches on molars, summons drowned sailors to her pleasure, and recalls, sharp as a pinprick, her life as the most savage of ash nymphs. Why then is she stuck, night after night, hovering above pillows to leave coins for gap-toothed brats? More important, how quickly can she captivate the jolly old elf to the north?

He's huge, fluffy, lonesome, and unbearably horny. On his Easter rounds, he contrives, as often as possible, to get a grip on himself and stare into interesting bedrooms. But who in the world will throw him down and ravage him as the lovers under his gaze ravage one another?

For the answers, unknot that bright red bow, tear off those wrappings, and enjoy!

In the opening lines of Santa Steps Out: A Fairy Tale for Grown-ups, we learn that God the Father had to "cut His vacation short" and is in a "towering rage" about it. It appears that while the archangel Michael was running things, the world got pretty screwed up. "Michael...you know that Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy are never to cross paths. It's one of our Father's most solemn injunctions." Ah, that Tooth Fairy. She's also got her hooks into the Easter Bunny.

Robert Devereaux is a master of vivid scene setting, especially gory scenes and sex scenes. There is a lot of sex in this book--mostly happy, lubricious sex that is sometimes downright amazing. Prepare for a strange and stimulating ride when you hop in the sleigh with Santa and witness all his adventures. Prepare to see childhood figures--figures known principally for delivering gifts in the night--in a whole new light. Devereaux is exuberantly polytheistic and well-grounded in Greek mythology, so along with the horror and humping, you'll be entertained by some notions about where all these immortals may have come from in the first place.

This signed, limited edition is a beauty to own: it has a full-color dust jacket by acclaimed artist Alan Clark, six full-page illustrations by Clark, a foreword ("Robert Devereaux Boldly Goes...") by David G. Hartwell about how the novel came into being, another foreword ("You Hold a Dangerous Book in Your Hands") by Patrick LoBrutto, and an afterword by the author. --Fiona Webster