How to Cope When You Are Surrounded by Idiots. or If You Are One

A course designed to give remedial training to idiots so that they can function in society. Includes test to determine who is an idiot and train-ing on 101 things you should absolutely never do. Also other unique methods of coping with idiots.

Wayne Allred, while not having been born in a log cabin or covered wagon, nevertheless descended from progenitors who lived a long time ago and who survived many privations.

As a young man, he distinguished himself by flipping spitwads far and with great accuracy while a high school student and also for once eating nearly an entire watermelon in one sitting.

Considerable money was invested in his education which he actively pursued.

As an adult he has so far (as of 7/20/94) never been arrested for murder and he still has all of his own teeth.

He is a mammal. His favorite color is aqua.

He currently resides with his family where he can often be found.